Slab of Heaven

That was not one of those teeny tiny dessert plates, I kid you not.

Happy Birthday, Ponyboy! We all hope you had all the cake you could ever want to eat. And more!

JAZZ HANDS

Allow me to re-introduce myself....
How funny was it that I was convinced newly anointed NY Governor David Paterson used this Jay-Z line in his inaugural speech or whatever earlier this week? I'd like to think he was referencing "Public Service Announcement" (one of my favoritest songs ever) or Dave Chappelle, when he used the line in a skit.

I haven't been here for three months. Actually... two months and three weeks? So I just caught up, and I did comment on every post I'd missed during that time. I really did!

I have not really been myself for the past three months. Maybe even for the last six months. I don't know if it's the surgery, the cancer, my crappy job, the writer's strike, The Wire ending, or certain other things coming to an end, or what exactly. I don't really enjoy the same things I used to and I'm not sure I entirely enjoy new things I've taken up.

BUT there are some things that inject the heart with a mega-syringe full of undeniable joy. My latest something, discovered a couple of weekends ago, is America's Best Dance Crew. This one is ending pretty soon too - maybe tonight, actually. That's why you should watch it.

Now I've never watched a dance (or singing) reality show the whole way through. Well... ok, but the Pussycat Dolls' shows don't count because they're "singing" and "dancing". But Dance Crew, created by Randy Jackson whom I've tended to like in the few minutes of Idol that I've watched, is really entertainingly put together, and set to music that I might actually listen to, voluntarily.

All the episodes are available here. I would recommend Episodes 3, 5, and 6. The top two groups (in my opinion) are Jabbawockeez and Kaba Modern - both repping hard for the SoCal Asian Americans (big ups to CTOWNGAL!) All the groups I've seen are pretty creative but these two are fricking awesome.


Kaba Modern: The flyest fashion, and the coolest unexpected isolation moves and hand motions.






Jabbawockeez: Yep, they always wear those masks, and they work it. it's a little spooky, but they have the best sense of humor that translates well into the dancing.

Honorable mentions: Fysh'n'Chicks, BRKSK8 for being on skates or however you spell it.









Why else?

JC Chasez, getting his Simon Cowell on, tries very hard not to break a smile, and ends up looking like a constipated bitchy queen. He saves his warmth for Pussycat Dolls Present: Girlicious, apparently.







Li'l Mama, of "My Lip Gloss is Poppin'" "fame", delivers the most serious, heartfelt and entertaining-in-itself, but not like Simon or Paula criticism. She may look 40 to me, but she is only 19 or something. She sounds like a hip-hop Debbie Allen. Damn. I would kill to sound like a hip-hop Debbie Allen.





I have also decided that I may partake in this whole bandana trend. I think I also need a sweatband and matching wristbands for the gym. I am sure we can start a whole discussion on dance fashion once Bravo's oddly named and oddly hosted (Elizabeth Berkley?) show Step It Up and DANCE premieres.

Breakup songs

AC and I started a discussion this past weekend about what would be on our "break-up song mix." To get us started, here are a few of my favorites. Please add to the list...

I Hate You So Much Right Now by Kelis (pretty funny video to the song on youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wnm51FJHUd4&feature=related)

Last Tears by Indigo Girls

The Heart of the Matter (the Don Henley version or the India Arie cover)

Stuck in a Moment by U2

Let Go by Frou Frou

Forever Blue by Chris Isaack (entire album is pretty good, though "I Believe" is a particularly good one...)

Of pies and cakes

There was a discussion yesterday about the nature of Boston Cream Pie. Is it a pie or a cake?

Wikipedia tells us:
The Boston cream pie is a cake contrary to its name. The idea of it being a pie most likely stems from the easier availability of pie tins over cake pans during the time the dish originated. (It might also originate from the use of the custard cream filling which is usually associated with pies rather than cakes.)

The most important thing, really, is the Dunkin Donuts version, don't you think?

Wardrobe Essentials? A poll in honor of the Tim Gunn and the PR finale....

Tim Gunn suggests:
10 Essential Items Every Woman Needs
• Basic black dress
• Trench coat
• Classic dress pants
• Classic white shirt
• Skirt
• Blazer
• Day dress
• Cashmere sweater
• Jeans
• A comfortable alternative to a sweatsuit

What do you think are wardrobe essentials (particularly as the sun sets on the 20s for many of us)?

happy vday my friends!

maybe this is how I feel

analysis, please?

ever wondered where lauren and audrina hang?

well...wonder no more.

gridskipper's a cool site that often incorporates my love of google, maps and food into visual landscapes of information (frilly and otherwise).

check it out.

bbc america-ed

am i turning into madonna? a total brit-phile who can't bear to consume television that doesn't have a posh accent?

gobsmacked. bloody.

that's brilliant...lovely...

i've recently uk-ified my dvr settings and have been consuming bbc america tv shows like they're going out of stye.

some of my favs include gordon ramsay's (pictured here) "kitchen nightmares" a look into the most disfunctional family businesses that often serve as large-scale incubators of e. coli and other forms of unsavory bacterias, "you are what you eat" a crazy nutritionists vehicle for banishing rotten poo and refined sugars, and "how clean is your house" a voyeuristic view into the most slobbish packrats of britain that often require serious psychological intervention.

what has gotten into me?

Three dollars' worth of that bathroom Polo

If, in an alternative world, Aging Cowgirl were a highly successful country act, she would definitely cover Carrie Underwood's "Before He Cheats".

My favorite part of the lyrics:

Right now, she's probably up singing some
white-trash version of Shania karaoke
Right now, she's probably saying "I'm drunk"
and he's a thinking that he's gonna get lucky,
Right now, he's probably dabbing on 3 dollars' worth of that bathroom Polo
And he don't know

That I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive,
carved my name into his leather seats,
I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights,
slashed a hole in all 4 tires
Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats.

I might've saved a little trouble for the next girl,
Cause the next time that he cheats

Oh, you know it won't be on me

*She looks a little like Britney, pre-meltdown, here, doesn't she?
** This post is in no way condoning auto vandalism or vigilante justice.

Happy New Year!!

Hope 2008 is a happy, frilly, thrilly year for all of you!

Good company and good baked... goods!

	Twinkie Cupcake! Shared with lilbunny, 9/22/07 somecaféwhosenameIforgot butit'sneartotheyarnshopCloseKnit Ho-ho-kus, NJ

	Pumpkin Chocolate Chip "Muffin" made and shared with starbright oogi, 11/17/07 Philadelphia, PA

HELLO?

Seriously.

HELLO?

no dairy and no soy make zuppe SOMETHING SOMETHING

YOU GUYS.

I am on Day 2 of a two-week low-iodine diet and HOW can people live without dairy or soy or whole eggs, or the algae-based thickeners which make life awesome! OH THE INHUMANITY. I swear both the chocolate chip muffins and the cream cheese in the break room are audibly taunting me!

I thought I would be all excited to cook'n'freeze lots of vegetable-y goodness and bake pan after pan of slightly indulgent muffins and cakes (no butter, no egg yolks, but sugar is allowed).

But alas, my days have consisted of:

• oatmeal
• fruits (I know, me! and fruit! and me, dependent on fruit!)
• nuts
• rice (limited amounts)
• potatoes without skins
• safe mom food such as dal, ground turkey (limited amounts), cabbage
• salad with vinegar & oil dressing, and the dreaded baby carrots
• coffee or pure cocoa with sugar
• hours of mental anguish over what the hell to eat
• hours of mental blahs because of hunger
• fantasizing about milkshakes and cheese

But now I've got a pile of greens at home, and in the immortal words of Kara Janx from Project Runway 2 -- all I want to do is smoke it. Why, oh WHY, did I ask for kale when it probably takes cream, cheese, or soy sauce, or an ungodly combination of all three to make it edible for immature palates like mine?

I really do adore processed foods. I mean, making your own vegetable stock! WHO DOES THAT?

Well, maybe Elisa Jimenez from Project Runway 4.

$10 T-shirts.... until 12/16

A variety of cheap, cheesy, cute and cool shirts. I have a bunch from here and remember talking to some frillseeker(s) about them ... www.threadless.com

MAKE IT WORK!

He's (almost) ba-a-a-ack!

We've survived through Top Chef 2, Top Design, Shear Genius, Top Chef 3 (!), Tim Gunn's Guide to Style, aaaaand Heidi Klum's limited edition cosmetics collection for Victoria's Secret (by the way, some very tempting stuff!) but NOTHING could replace the high of the one, the only, the sublime Project Runway!

Well, Project Runway Canada has been doing a pretty awesome job, but, well, there's none of The Divine Tim Gunn! Though Brian Bailey (mentor) and Iman (host, judge) come pretty close to divinity, Iman especially. If you need a fix between now and Wednesday's premiere of Project Runway 4, check out PR.ca on msroyalt's excellent and addictive youtube page.

For a taste of Season 4, check out the bios for the de-SIGH-ners at the Bravo site. I know, I know, the site hurts my eyes too. Maybe we should wait through a couple of seasons of Top Web Design before Season 5 of PR?

buy handmade

Zuppe, those cookies were delicious! Autumn brings out the baker in people. Even me. I have an inkling to bake pumpkin bread. And a few weeks ago, I made yogurt scones. Yummy.

Anyway, I have a friend makes T shirt designs. Check out here her creations here: www.amuse.etsy.com

Also, she directed me to this website about a documentary on indie crafters. They're a bit too serious for my tastes, but 8 minute documentary shows some pretty nifty crafts. http://www.mediabistro.com/unbeige/crafty/handmade_nation_gets_made_69456.asp

Cookie monster

Last week I was excited to make some cookies. I played mad scientist
with this recipe:

1/2 cup shortening (unsalted butter)
1 cup white sugar (mostly organic; I would maybe use less sugar next time)
2 eggs
1/4 cup milk
1 1/2 3/4 cups all-purpose buckwheat flour
3/4 cup almond meal (from Trader Joe)
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 cup raisins chocolate chips (half semi-sweet, half
milk chocolate)
1 2/3 cups quick cooking oats

DIRECTIONS:
1. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C).
Grease Lay some foil over cookie sheets.

2. In a medium bowl, cream together the shortening and sugar until
smooth. Beat in the eggs one at a time, then stir in the milk. Combine
the flour, almond meal, baking soda, salt and cinnamon, gradually stir
into the creamed mixture. Add the raisins chocolate chips and
quick oats; mix until just combined. Drop by rounded spoonfuls onto
the prepared cookie sheet.

3. Bake for 8 to 10 12-15 minutes in the preheated
oven. Allow cookies to cool on baking sheet for 5 minutes before
removing to a wire rack to cool completely.

I'm only sorry I didn't take any pictures before they were, er, gone!

Questions for the Keebler elves in the crowd:
1. Do you think a mixture of half butter and half applesauce would work? Or would it be too "moist"? (Ewwwww.)

2. What about using less sugar? Would that alter the texture a lot?

Sometimes I be bored

So I had a random, abstract word in my Google search bar, and decided to search for it in Google Maps, on a whim, to see what came up. It's kind of fun, really.

Try it!

The Vartan is Back

Welcome back to network television (of the non-reality-tv-kind)). I spent WAY too much time in front of the TV last week. IMHO: Some big "mehs" included: "K-ville", "Dirty Sexy Money" and "Big Shots" (more below). A major disappointment included: "The Bionic Woman". Some fun times were spent with: "Chuck" (Adam Baldwin as a "Best Buy" saleperson!), "Gossip Girl", "Bones", "Smallville" and "How I Met Your Mother" (which introduced me to the term "tramp stamp"). And damn you "Brothers and Sisters" for making me cry. Again.

So I won't be watching "Big Shots" again, if I can help it. But it appears that Couch Baron on TWOP and I are in agreement that if we were to watch it again (unfortunately for CB, it seems like it's his job to watch it), we would only be watching if for the Vartan. (Check out the funny page 3 of the Big Shots recap -- that's what the link is to!) Even on a show where I guess he's supposed to be alpha-male like, he comes off as so cuddly :).

I missed most of "Chuck" this week due to the NL Wild Card playoff game. I *really* don't want to talk about that. It's 4.5 hours of my life I will never get back. And I think I was actually grieving yesterday. For reals. But like I said, I don't want to talk about it. Back to "Chuck": the Sci-Fi channel reruns the "Chuck" eps over the weekend, I think, so I might still catch it. "Bones" last night was fun, with the Boreanaz acting particularly goofy at the end, which is always a good time. Tonight is definitely Gossip Girl.

And just when I thought I'd given up on network tv...