I am on Day 2 of a two-week low-iodine diet and HOW can people live without dairy or soy or whole eggs, or the algae-based thickeners which make life awesome! OH THE INHUMANITY. I swear both the chocolate chip muffins and the cream cheese in the break room are audibly taunting me!
I thought I would be all excited to cook'n'freeze lots of vegetable-y goodness and bake pan after pan of slightly indulgent muffins and cakes (no butter, no egg yolks, but sugar is allowed).
But alas, my days have consisted of:
- oatmeal
- fruits (I know, me! and fruit! and me, dependent on fruit!)
- nuts
- rice (limited amounts)
- potatoes without skins
- safe mom food such as dal, ground turkey (limited amounts), cabbage
- salad with vinegar & oil dressing, and the dreaded baby carrots
- coffee or pure cocoa with sugar
- hours of mental anguish over what the hell to eat
- hours of mental blahs because of hunger
- fantasizing about milkshakes and cheese
But now I've got a pile of greens at home, and in the immortal words of Kara Janx from Project Runway 2 -- all I want to do is smoke it. Why, oh WHY, did I ask for kale when it probably takes cream, cheese, or soy sauce, or an ungodly combination of all three to make it edible for immature palates like mine?
I really do adore processed foods. I mean, making your own vegetable stock! WHO DOES THAT?
Well, maybe Elisa Jimenez from Project Runway 4.
2 comments:
have you ever seen wife swap, zuppe? maybe you should think yourself as being one of those shows and your "new family" is bizarre and are on a low-iodine diet...and can i just say that i actually had *no* idea that dairy and soy had iodine? isn't that something in salt??? i should have paid more attention in chemistry classes perhaps.
I had no idea there was iodine in dairy and soy until now, either!
But there's iodine a-plenty in any food from the sea (fish, seaweed, sea salt), and anything grown near the sea (probably why rice is limited), plus egg yolks, dairy and soy. Plus rhubarbs, potato skins, and certain beans.
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